The four words no guy wants to hear.

"No sex before marriage."

Really, such a simple sentence -phrase, even- shouldn't have that much weight. But, to the guy I'm currently pseudo-dating, saying that was a very bad mistake. Although he swears upon everything that it doesn't matter, his face just as I said it told the real story. His eyes wide, his jaw slightly slack, he stuttered out a small, "Ok..." and went on his way (he was leaving my house, after all.).

What's with the stigma of "saving yourself"? I understand that this decision comes tied with a big religious connotation but what about those of us who'd rather just stay safe, away from the glaring eye of an unplanned pregnancy or a damaging disease? What if you're simply not ready?

The pressures for a girl to "put out" for a guy are just ridiculous nowadays. And this is coming from an eighteen-year old who grew up in a pretty sheltered society. I shudder to think about all those girls who don't have nice boys around to respect them. The ones who are having sex at thirteen because it's "cool" and will make them popular. The ones who get used and tossed and ostracized either because they did eventually give in to the whims of someone else, or because they decided to stand by their beliefs.

And that's the funny thing, we live in a society where it's OK to have sex, be sexy, be lose. The media teaches its audience, "Hey, it's OK to have sex! It's OK to be a teenage mother! Look at Britney's sister! Look at those "Pregnancy Pact" girls! They did it and they couldn't be happier. They're even getting out attention." This attention, my friends, is being given to the wrong issues.

For me, that one-minute exchange left me feeling confused and a little hurt. But I know that he'll respect me because he's just that kind of person. However, for hundreds of other girls, there might not be a happy ending. They might be black-listed because they said no, or black-listed because they said yes. They might commit suicide if the pressure is too strong, they might break and ruin their lives forever. Whatever the case may be, the ultimate problem is that there isn't a half-way point. In high school, it's either one or the other. In real life, it's pretty much the same deal -except maybe without so much awful drama.

Confused. Disappointed with society.

Gabs

Song of the moment: "The River of Dreams" -Billy Joel